I called my brother at lunch today. He’s a rare coins and bullion broker. On the spur of the moment, I used a heavy Southern dialect and gave the receptionist a fake name. He picked up:

Pete: This is Pete Winckler at ______ Rare Coins. Me: (thickly) Hi there, Pete, this is Joe Carreyon. Lissen, I saw on yer website that you had them Saint-Gaudens — the ones from the treasure ship? Pete: We do have the pre-1933 Saint-Gaudens gold coins; unfortunately, they’re not shipwreck coins. Me: Huh. See, I was hopin’ to get some o’ them Saint-Gaudens from the traysure ship.
Pete: We do have shipwreck coins; they’re just not Saint-Gaudens, sir. Me: Well, that’s a damn shame. Hmmm. Lemme tell you hwhut: you got a brother, don’t cha, one whut’s real good at acting and accents? Pete: You little bastard.
Me: (long giggling)

He said that it was the first and last time I’d get him, but he’s wrong. Maybe I’ll get Lou to call next time.